


Four times it ends

by redkay



Category: Shameless (US)
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-04-20
Updated: 2013-04-20
Packaged: 2017-12-08 23:21:26
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death, Underage
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,539
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/767275
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/redkay/pseuds/redkay
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>And one time it doesn't.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Four times it ends

**five**

“Done is done. You think we’re boyfriend-girlfriend here? You’re nothing but a warm mouth to me.”

All right, maybe it was a shitty thing to say but it’s been months. Gallagher should really have gotten over it and should be getting _on_ him. But he’s not, he’s just rolling his eyes at Mickey and asking if it was really necessary for him to beat the shit out of the guy he was fucking.

(It was, but he doesn’t really know why)

“You got any fuck left in you or you dump it all in that faggot’s ass?” But Gallagher just laughs at him, the fucker, and asks if Mickey needs his job back.

(He does, but that’s not why this was his first stop after taking a quick shower and changing clothes, blowing off Mandy’s stupid celebration plans)

Mickey doesn’t know what the fuck is going on, but he knows this isn’t what he expected. He sort of thought Gallagher might throw a punch and they could have angry sex like they hadn’t since their first time, and man that was good. Or maybe he’d be a total pussy about it like the last time Mickey got out of juvie and his whole face would light up when he saw him, like it was fucking Christmas or some shit, and Mickey was the best toy he could have asked for (which was a really fucking weird metaphor considering some of the dreams Mickey had about Gallagher and toys).

Whatever. It’s not like he thought about it much, but he figured he’d get something. It’s not like Gallagher was ever that good at hiding his feelings no matter how hard Mickey tried to drill it into his head to stop being such a fucking girl. Happy, sad, pissed, whatever, Mickey could always tell.

But now Gallagher’s finished getting dressed and already walking out from under the bleachers, not even checking to see if Mickey’s following. 

(He is, but he’s got a sick feeling in his stomach for some reason)

They still fuck most days in the storeroom but Gallagher doesn’t do any of the girly shit that Mickey was always warning him against anymore. He fucks other guys and he doesn’t care when Mickey does the same right in front of him. It’s annoying, is what it is, but Mickey can’t say exactly what the problem is since the sex is as good as ever so he just keeps his mouth shut.

A year later Ian enlists and Mickey gets up the nerve to kiss him for the first time. Gallagher smiles a little sadly and says, “See ya, Mick,” and Mickey finally gets it. It shouldn’t sting since it’s not like they were ever gonna be anything more than fuck buddies and its not like he actually expected Gallagher to stay or anything.

This was what he wanted and he doesn’t get why it hurts so much to watch Gallagher get on the bus the next day.

(But it does.)

**four**

It’s not even really surprising when she tells him. He’s a Milkovich and this is just his luck.

Of-fucking-course a quick fuck with Angie Zaggo so he could look Gallagher in the eye again would knock her up.

Lip and Mandy are fucking on the couch when she comes over with the stick (and seriously, she walked all the way over here with a pee stick, what the fuck). Mandy cackles like the bitch she is and starts congratulating him and Lip’s eyebrows disappear into his hairline and he gets out of there before Mandy can even break out the beer.

It’s the first and only time he’s ever been grateful that Lip is fucking his little sister, as it saves him the trouble of telling Gallagher himself.

That doesn’t mean he’s not dreading going to work the next day though. Gallagher’s sitting at the register when he walks in and just stares at him with that wounded puppy expression, which is so fucking stupid. It’s not like he didn’t know Mickey fucked Angie and yeah, newsflash, that’s where babies come from. Idiot.

“Wanna fuck?” he tries half-heartedly, mainly just to see Gallagher sneer at him because his face looks so fucking retarded when he does.

“I can’t believe you,” he says.

“I don’t know what your problem is. You’re not the one whose gotta pay child support for the next twenty years.”

“You gonna marry her?”

“Fuck no.” Actually he offered, but she turned him down. Said this baby didn’t mean she wasn’t gonna keep playing the field and hey, respect. 

He lets Gallagher fuck him face to face that day as an apology even though he didn’t do anything wrong.

Things stay good for a while after that. The baby shit turns out to be kind of cool, actually. Angie lets him come to the doctor with her and he gets those creepy pictures of the fetus. Terry’s thrilled about the whole thing, probably cause he’s bored of fucking up his kids and wants to move on to new meat, but Mickey’s already decided he’s not letting his dad anywhere near his kid.

He quits the Kash and Grab when a better paid job doing construction comes around when Angie’s five months. He’s not really sure she’s showing, cause she was kind of a cow to begin with, but the baby kicks like a ninja, which is pretty awesome.

He moves out of his dad’s place a week before the baby is due and into a small, shitty apartment he can barely afford. Angie comes with and her parents give her a bit of money each month so their grandchild doesn’t grow up in a slum.

He runs into Gallagher at the store, his hands full with diapers and Fritos, and realizes he hasn’t seen him in weeks. There’s a gnawing guilt in the back of his throat, but Gallagher just smiles at him a bit awkwardly and rings up his shit. 

“We should, uh, catch up sometime,” he offers, digging through his pockets for cash. It’s been a while since he’s had a good fuck, and Angie’s always saying it would mellow him out.

“Yeah, sure.” Gallagher hands him his bag and their fingers brush; Mickey almost says something, but his phone rings and it’s Angie yelling at him to pick up some special baby food that looks like vomit, and he’s out the door.

**three**

Terry comes home early and Mickey splits. His dad went straight for Gallagher and Mickey’s got time to yank on some pants. There’s no way to spin this, his dad definitely knows now and he’ll kill him. And Gallagher…Gallagher can look after himself.

He’s around the corner when he stops to call the cops. His brothers will kill him; if there’s one rule in the Milkovich house it’s that you never turn in family. But he’s got no other choice, and if there’s one rule that’s been beat into Mickey’s head by this world it’s every man for them-fucking-selves. 

He watches the house until he hears sirens coming and then he walks over to the nearest bar and gets shitfaced. 

When Mandy wakes him up the next morning—and he’s got no clue how he ended up getting back home—she tells him Terry was arrested for violating his parole. But her voice is level and there are no tears on her cheeks, so she must not know about Gallagher. Which means he got out, just like Mickey knew he would.

It’s a few days and a lot of alcohol later when he finally runs into him. Mickey’s stopped showing up to work, but it’s a small fucking neighborhood so of course he walks right into Gallagher, his brother and Mandy on their way to get some will notarized or some shit. His face is a bit banged up but he looks mostly fine. He grins at Mickey through a split lip and, after checking that Lip is busy with Mandy, says, "Thanks for calling the cops.”

“Whatever, man,” Mickey says and doesn’t meet his swollen eye. 

Gallagher hesitates before saying, “Sorry about your dad.” Mickey laughs because Gallagher actually sounds sincere about that, which is just so fucking twisted. 

“You coming, Ian?” Lip calls back. He’s eying Mickey suspiciously, like he’s got a guess as to where Ian got those bruises.

“Yeah, one minute,” Gallagher replies, and then looks at Mickey. But Mickey’s got no clue what he wants from him, why he’s standing in front of him and staring at him like that, like he’s pleading for something. 

Finally Gallagher just sighs and says, “Linda’ll fire you if you don’t show at work soon,” and Mickey nods. 

He goes home because he can’t remember where he was going in the first place and throws up in the sink. 

His dad’s in prison and out of his way for the next six to eight years and Gallagher’s cool with everything for once in his fucking life and Mickey hates himself so much he can’t breathe and he doesn’t understand why.

After that it’s easier to just find a new fuck buddy, one without so much baggage. Yeah, Gallagher looks hurt and guilty when they run into each other and Lip always looks like he’s one step away from punching him and Mandy’s confused and pissed off but sex shouldn’t be this complicated anyway.

It’s better this way.

**two**

Ian gets blown up three and a half years into his first tour. Mickey’s not surprised; he’s been waiting for the news since he left. Svetlana comforts a crying Mandy, because of course they had to become friends so they could more efficiently ruin his life.

The baby was a stillborn, but Mickey’s never gotten around to divorcing his wife. He tells himself it’s because of Terry, but really it’s because Mandy would beat his ass if he left her out to dry. Besides, she brings in more money whoring than anyone in the Milkovich family has managed through various assorted crimes, so there’s that. And yeah, every time he looks at her he thinks about Gallagher in his doorway and fucking him in the basement and a lot of other things he doesn’t want to remember, but that’s not her fault.

“Will you go to funeral?” she asks him that night when he’s moved from beer to whiskey. 

“Fuck no,” he says, and she runs a gentle hand through his hair. 

“You are stupid boy,” she says, but there’s no bite to it. With a bitter laugh, he thinks he should just be glad Mandy hasn’t taught her what pussy means yet.

It’s obnoxiously hot the day of the funeral and Mickey calls in sick to the Kash and Grab (tries to ignore the sympathy in Linda’s voice) and hides in his house all day. When the sun goes down he wanders out to the baseball field because he’s apparently as much of a girl as he always accused Gallagher of being. He kicks at the grass and kind of wants to scream.

There’s a laugh behind him, and Mickey almost jumps out of his skin. Lip walks out from the shadows, a bottle of jack swinging from his hand.

“Jesus,” he says, stumbling slightly. “Jesus.” Mickey braces himself for a hit that doesn’t come; instead Lip grabs his shoulder to steady himself. “You. You were actually fucking in love with him,” he says, his voice betraying his amazement. “I always thought he just…but you were, weren’t you?”

Mickey doesn’t say anything, doesn’t really have the right. Lip’s more wasted than he’s ever seen him, out of control in a way he never allows himself to be. Mandy would know how to handle him, but all Mickey can do is awkwardly lower him to the ground before he falls.

He doesn’t really know if he was in love with Gallagher, but he thinks maybe he could have been, if he’d had the chance.

“C’mon asshole,” he mutters, and drags Lip back to his feet. He can’t fix anything, but he can get Lip back to his house and with the rest of his family. He thinks Ian would’ve liked that.

**and one**

Because they’re actually not completely retarded, it takes the Army about two days to figure out that Ian isn’t who he says he is. He’s kicked out with little fanfare; they don’t even bother to dishonorably discharge him, just stick him back on a bus with a stern warning.

Or so Mandy says, anyway. And she’s started doing that; hanging out in his doorway and talking to him about Gallagher and his family, like he gives a flying shit. 

But they are just a bit retarded, because putting a 17 year old runaway on a bus back home with no supervision and expecting him to actually get there isn’t really the best plan.

So the whole thing is a fucking mess, with everyone blaming everyone else. Lip’s pissed at Mandy for not telling him about the Army thing, Mandy’s pissed at Mickey for not stopping it in the first place, and everyone’s a bit pissed at Ian for disappearing into thin air and only sending the occasional postcard. (Those are actually pretty hilarious, Mickey thinks, because he’s pretty sure Ian’s just fucking with them at this point. Last week Lip and Mandy spent half a day at the library tracking the fucking migratory patterns of robins just because Ian mentioned seeing two humping in a park)

For his part, Mickey isn’t really pissed at anyone, not even Svetlana, who actually turns out to be a pretty good drinking partner. The army thing, yeah, that was a problem. But Gallagher running off to find himself or some Lifetime movie shit, well that’s just a fucking joke. 

Lip’s not a genius for nothing, though, and just under two months after Gallagher fucked off he’s standing in the doorway to the Kash and Grab.

“Hey,” Mickey says, looking him up and down and not even bothering to hide his shit-eating grin. He’s scrawnier than he was when he left and his hair is longer, curling a bit at the ends, and it makes him look younger.

“Hey,” Gallagher says cautiously, like he’s expecting a fight. To be fair, he’s probably gotten quite a few of those since getting back.

“Looking for your job back? I could probably put in a good word for you with Towelhead.” 

That finally jars Gallagher out of his shock and he scowls at Mickey, his whole face twisted up in annoyance, and it looks so fucking ridiculous and familiar that Mickey laughs. “Fuck you,” Gallagher says. “Get off the fucking register, you’re probably screwing it up.”

And just like that (plus an obligatory eye-roll from Linda when she gets back) things go back to normal. Or as normal as shit ever gets. Gallagher might still hate him, but everyone at his house is pissed at Ian, so he doesn’t have a lot of choices when it comes to hanging out. And fuck if hate sex isn’t fantastic. 

Mickey still can’t say everything Ian wants to hear, can’t even bring himself to admit it to himself, but hell, he figures they’ve got time.


End file.
